You are in Control

59f44238b41e8_sailing-boat-wave-teeth-rough-sea-154545-65aa8ce8077ba2775567706a1b6136eb.jpgSo often we let our circumstances, decisions and experiences determine what our maximum potential is as a person. We see other ‘successful’ people and become envious, jealous and make excuses as to why we aren’t ‘successful’ as well.

For a long time, I would fall into this latter category and dwell in my own misery and depression, never once questioning or challenging myself and simply asking, “How the hell did I end up here?” As a kid growing up, I was fortunate enough to be presented with numerous opportunities and allowed to live an above average lifestyle. Did I take advantage of these opportunities my parents gave me? Yes. Did I excel in certain areas? Yes. Was I becoming someone who was well rounded and full of life and thirst for knowledge? Yes.

Soo what changed…

Up until I was 15, I had a model childhood, every aspect of my life was firing on all cylinders. Up until that point I wasn’t the best-looking guy in school or the most athletic, but that summer I had a growth spurt and the following year everything changed for me. I had always played sports year-round and was an average player, but after I grew taller, my athleticism grew quickly with it. I was always a middle of a pack person at school never really sticking out in good or bad ways, but when I grew, I suddenly became the ‘popular’ guy at school. My whole mentality changed from someone who was OK being average to someone who thrived and wanted to be the best at everything. Humbleness went out the door and this elitist mentality began to grow and dictate the person I was going to be in life…

Well, that all changed on the night my parents sat my younger sister and I down where my mom shared with us she had been having an affair with my Youth Minister at Church. The second I had heard those words uttered from my Mom’s mouth, a sense of betrayal engulfed my inner being. Not fully understanding the situation at 15, but only knowing that I had been raised by my parents that having an affair/cheating was something that should never cross your mind. Looking back, I believe that night my feelings of compassion, love, happiness and that desire to become a better version of yourself and grow, died that very second.

All those feelings were replaced with laziness, anger, hatred and depression. I gave up on every aspect of my life from school, friends and sports. All I wanted to do was be left alone, eat food and play video games. I closed myself off, from everyone and everything and the worst part is I never once took full responsibility for the choices that led me to that point. Instead, I blamed my mom for EVERYTHING bad that happened to me and channeled my hatred, anger all towards her.

I wasn’t in control of my journey any longer and let my negative feelings and thoughts dictate every aspect of my life. Instead of challenging the negative parts of my life, I just gave up and said, “meh.” Who knows what type of man I would have become if I had though. I know now that I am the only person in control of my journey and only I can ALLOW others to influence and dictate it. In the end it is always in my power to say Yes or No.

That was one of the biggest lessons I learned from this whole experience and let me tell you, it wasn’t an easy lesson to learn. I am today still paying the price all those decisions I had made when I was younger, dumber and ignorant. Here is the best part though…

As you read this, you may start to feel an inner fire come alive inside of you, wanting to come out and motivate you to change something in your own life. I guarantee 99% of you including myself say, “I am in control of my journey and want to make A, B, C changes and achieve X, Y, Z goals……” This is great! You have become self-aware that you, yourself hold the keys to your own kingdom. Why do we all fall short and end up losing control of your journey? We started out great, said the right thing and had a can-do attitude… So, what happened?

The next part is what ALWAYS seems to follow up after you take control of your life, “Well, it’s already too late in the day, week, year and I’d rather start tomorrow, next month, beginning of the year…” People always tend to say they want to make these changes and take control, but only when the time is either perfect or convenient for them to do so…

I am telling you now, the PERFECT time to take control is NOW. Not in an hour, day, week or year… Now! Don’t put it off and just start this very second.

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