One of the biggest things to hold you back when making a change is YOU. I believe strongly it is the biggest contributor as to why most people fail and fall short of their true potential in life. Instead of believing in themselves, working hard towards achieving that change, people give up before they even start. Self-doubt clouds their inner being, which then prevents them from starting that change. I think a lot of people are aware that they are the biggest contributor as to why they fail. Those same people refuse to accept responsibility, ownership and instead blame something or someone else.
In the past when I failed, I would always say it was his or her fault, or because X, Y, and Z happened. I never was accountable and accepted the fact that the reason I failed was my OWN doing. So I was dealing with failure by externalizing it and channeling it onto other things or people. Not only was this unfair to others, but I probably pushed people away and lost friends in my life. Yea, it sucks to fail, but it even sucks, even more, knowing you and only you were the reason you failed. I have found that by accepting that I was the reason for my own demise that it has empowered me. Instead of letting it keep me down I have channeled that failure and now use it as a weapon, motivation, to prevent that failure from happening again. This wouldn’t be possible if I was blaming others and not accepting responsibility.
Throughout life, many of us have said either yes or no on numerous occasions. If you were to ask yourself, “How many times have I said No?” My guess is you would be surprised by the number that you could come up with. Most people, like myself, sometimes fall into the trap of being “comfortable.” What I mean is we get into routines that don’t challenge us and when a new opportunity arises we will often simply say, “No Thanks.” It’s not because we aren’t interested in doing it. but the opportunity is something that veers away from our routine, our comfort. Before we even have a chance to say yes, we subconsciously blurt out. “No.”
I have found that what has been working for me is not giving myself a chance to think, process new opportunities. I give myself 5 seconds, only 5 seconds, to think about anything because I will over analyze and make things so complex and what not I will demotivate myself and simply just say Nope! By limiting the amount of thought I put into new opportunities it has given me the chance to say, YES. By saying yes instead of no has opened numerous doors and new experiences for me. I was amazed at how simply changing my answer to a question would change my outlook on life.
You have probably heard this said numerous times throughout your life, I know I have, but it is sooo TRUE. Successful people surround themselves with people that are driven, positive and goal oriented. By doing this they create an environment that they can fall back on when they might need some external influence, advice or motivation during hard times. On the flip side, if you had people in your life that were lazy, negative and who knows what else, not only would they hold you back, they would bring you down. I say this because during those ‘hard times’ you may experience in life, having these types of people in your life wouldn’t try to motivate you or offer you positive advice. Instead, they would are content with you being the way you are or what you are going through, saying, “it’s not THAT bad.” So rather than fighting and powering through those hard times, we settle and we become lazy, just like the people we have in our life.
Everyone needs that one person in their life, that won’t butter up the truth or reality of the situation, but just be blunt and say it how it really is. We need to hear it raw, real and from someone that we respect and admire. Find that person and keep them close. \